Do you remember Chatroulette, Pranksters?

I only came across it back when I was writing online sex shop reviews for Toy With Me and searching for an angle to cover. If you have NO idea what I’m talking about, lemmie give you the very briefest of rundowns to the very best of my dwindling brain capacity.

Chatroulette was created by some college kid in (I believe) Russia who had the grand idea to create a site in which you could talk to various people around the globe via webcam. Neat, right? But you do see problem inherent, don’t you, Pranksters? THIS IS THE INTERNET WE’RE TALKING ABOUT.

If you have no idea what I mean by that, well, let’s just say, Internet = Penis-Galore.

So you could pop on your webcam and, in theory, make friends across the globe, so that you and your new-found globular friends could join hands and sing “We Are The World” a-Capella. In theory. Like communism. In theory.

If you got bored with the person you were talking to, you could simply switch to someone else to chat with…. except it didn’t work out so well. Basically, a Chatroulette session showed many a teenage girl what, exactly, a creepers pervert and his trouser snake looked like. Over. And. Fucking. Over. Sometimes, the mystique was, you’d manage to meet a celeb. IN THEORY.

This probably explains Chatroulette better than I can (is safe for work. Probably):

What you just saw, Pranksters, is Chatroulette at it’s finest. Apparently, the site’s still around to disgust the masses (just like this one!)

(holy long-winded intro, Batman!)

When Google Plus came out, I was all, why the balls am I getting invites to another social media network? Is this Google’s version of The Facebook? Why does my cat wipe his ass on the carpet? What the fuck is a hobby?

(pointless and un-pithy aside: I’m a firm believer that one can be good at between one and three social media platforms, but no more).

Most people who signed up with Google Plus were all, “daar, this isn’t Facebook,” and rather than just go back to where they came from (read: The Facebook) to continue playing with their fake farms, they complained bitterly about how G+ wasn’t Facebook. All over G+. That’s a fuck-ton of energy wasted right there.

Initially, I gave G+ the good old “meh,” and went back to The Twitter to spew my garbage in 140 characters or less. I had a couple G+ accounts because I have 76 email addresses for no good reason which meant that I inadvertently had 76 G+ accounts. But considering half of what I saw on there were those lame-ass picture quotes (like so):


Okay, so generally the quotes are more like this:

Chatroulette 2

Erms, sorta.

In my head it went something like this: “G+ is like Pinterest but with dudes.”

That was, of course, until the night of the Sandy Hook shooting. Since, as most of you are aware, I work for The Band Back Together Project, we decided that it would be a good night for us to do a G+ hangout to discuss our grief. That lasted 10 minutes before a bunch of people showed up and we got to know people, literally, around the world.

We’d been using G+ to conduct our board meetings for ages, but somehow, we’d never managed to connect that to the idea that there might be new and exciting people on Google Plus who did new and exciting things, like “NOT SHOW THE WORLD THEIR PEEN.” It was a fucking Internet Miracle.

If you have any doubts of it’s randomness, check out this video (skip to minute 1), taken by a friend of mine who’d been live-screening this G+ chat on YouTube (if you skip around, you can see how bizarre it is).

So if’n you’re ever on G+ and want to chat, here’s my page and my profile. I’ve made a couple of communities for us (one for mah blog and one for Teh Band) so we can hang out together and, quite frankly, I’d love to meet you, Pranksters. The Band community is hosting a hangout tonight at 7CST and I’ll be there.

Gaps in geography means that it’s hard to really hang out, unless, of course, we do it online. And so, we make our way into the future. A future with less peen and more community.

I gotta say, it looks pretty bright from here.

16 thoughts on “Like Chatroulette But With Less Wang

  1. Now, if I were remotely good at social chit-chat and making conversation; if my wifi was acctually good enough and reliable enough to video-chat; I might not hate my life today.

  2. I really want to like G+, in part because FB is starting to give me heartburn. I think once I figure out the G+ app — or they improve the current app — I’ll be all over G+. Because I am a Google whore.

  3. Just found The Band today…wow. Thanks for being here. On another note, found out about Chat roulette via my 14 year old daughter. Apparently her friends were using it to meet foreign guys. I checked it out and was mortified. I now really don’t like those friends…and CR is blocked on her devices. Every time she asks to visit one of those girls’ homes, I say no. ugh. And yet another note, awesome of you to create the G+ communities. I will keep up to date and hope to make it sometime.

  4. My parents restricted my access to much of the available social media because of an incident involving my utilizing a proxy server in my middle school’s media center in order to circumvent the district’s censorship software, resulting in a possible pervert (Is there really any universally accepted criteria for precisely what defines a pervert as such?). Now that I’m a legal adult and can do whatever the hell I want, I find that college takes away all my time to explore the available options. I think I have a Google+ account, but I haven’t actually used it.

    Thanks for the overview.

    1. I meant to say that my actions resulted in “attempted contact from a possible pervert,,” as opposed to the possible existence from a possible pervert. Duh. I would think it’s generally stipulated that perverts are possible.

      I got up really early to watch the inauguration. That’s my excuse.

  5. I made a Google + account a long time ago and then kind of forgot about it. Now I’m feeling like I’m missing out on something and I hate missing out. It looks like I’ll start using Google +.

  6. I am on G+ mostly because I am TC for Google and figured I needed to know the platform, but I haven’t really spent much time on there. I am currently on a FB boycott because I am just so sick and tired of all the negative crap that I don’t need in my life (I have enough of my own shit to deal with, I don’t need to add negativity from around the globe to it). I mostly use G+ to contact my fellow TCs and Google staffers and to push updates from my gazillion blogs (okay, I don’t have that many….LOL). I have thought the hangouts sound like fun and they are definitely cheaper than paying for conference calls through Skype…LOL. Unfortunately, I really don’t have “friends or family” on G+…just co-workers so I am not sure how much hanging out I would do.

    It sounds like you have a good thing going there and hopefully it won’t get filled with peen!

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