(I’ll be adding some more through the day. Why? Because obviously)
Oh, these are SO funny!! Thanks for sharing…you brightened up my day considerably! Keep em coming, Jana. I tweeted you and shared on Facebook…my friends will love your humor.
*blushes* Glad you liked them!
LOL! I love these!
Maybe I should send the first one to my mom. 😉
Thanks for letting me wreck up your vagina, in ways dad never could.
Love, your son.
Wait til you see the Mother’s Day post I’m brewing. My mom is a hoot. And a half… You’ll be scarred for life!!
I just sent this link to my fake moms AND my mother in law. Guess who is NOT in the running for favorite child?!
My mom would love these. But Aunt Becky, she thinks you are the greatest thing on The Twitter and one of the only reasons she checks her Twitter.
I’m designing a card to send to my grown kids on their birthdays. Something telling them that I am spending all the cash I can get my hands on before I die and I’m leaving them my old 60’s CDs. Or maybe I’ll just wait until I get into the GOOD Nursing Home and then tell them I left everything to that cute bartender at Chili’s.
Oh I love them… thanks for sharing those. My mom hates Mother’s Day and she would LOVE to get one of those. Good giggle, just what I needed.
Bwhahahaha You never fail to disappoint I LOVE the Nursing home and Creepy baby hands cards PRICELESS.
The one about the flowers is totally a card I would get my mom! Love these!
These are perfect. My crazy mother would appreciate it, I’m sure.
AB, you totally rock! If I spoke to my crazy ass bitch of a mother, these would be perfect for her! Hmm, but NOTHING at all is better!!
You are great! LOL
Jacking asshole bluebirds is about to become my favorite past time.
Fabulous. Who wouldn’t love one of these cards for Mother’s Day?
I love it when you do these cards. Now seriously, when are you going to come out with your own Hallmark line?
When you care enough to send the very best… 🙂
Awesome. And happy Mother’s Day to YOU!
Thank you Aunt Becky, I have been looking for the perfect mother’s day cards for my mom & step mom. Now I am just gonna sent them this post. (((HUGS))) Happy Mother’s Day to you, and thanks for raising your own fucking kids! You are a hero.
OK, so when are the “Shut your whore mouth, MOM!” Mother’s Day cards coming out? That’s what I want to know…
You are a warped and twisted woman. That’s why I love you.
Those are so friggin awesome! I especially like the hemlock one… Thanks for the laugh!
*snooort* pissed my undies. Actually the flowers card looks exactly like the one I’ll be giving to my out-law.
That first one is something I tell my mom all the time.
Love it. You are so witty.
those are just too funny!!!! Love them!
I totally forgot to send my mom hemlock this year. Rats!
I really wish I had printed one of these out instead of the card that I gave my mom . . . that would have rocked.
You seriously need to start and online store (like the Bloggess has) to sell these cards. So damned funny.
I love the first one! I’ve been telling my mom that she is going into a home with “State run facility” in the title. All 20/20 sytle where they leave you in your filth parked in a corner.
I always look forward to your greeting cards!
Dear Aunt Becky – instead of giving my mom a card this Mother’s Day, I think I will remind her that she popped me out of her belly (umm…C-section, you know) just to put me here on this earth to lip-sync to gangsta rap. Since she doesn’t know how to use a computer, I will have to pull up my blog for her. SEE? EASY? Not to mention better than a card.
The hemlock one is cracking my shit UP! You have a gift for card making.
AB, I sent the last one to my mom and she wrote back “Lol, you are! you are!” she then forwarded the email to my dad and said, “well at least one of our children thinks of me” and he said, “you should be so proud.”
I called her later and she told me about this. Then she said she was going to send it to my brothers and say “see! this is how you honor your mother!” but she decided against it since she and I have that type of relationship and it hasn’t occurred naturally with the little boys (ages 21 and 25). i then forced her to read the rest of them and we had a good laugh.
All that said, I LOVE when you do these. they make me happy in the pants.
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