If you have no idea what I’m talking about, go here for a visit, then come back. It’ll make more sense that way.
Hm…It’s lunch time. What shall I cook?
Wow, those cookbooks are shiny and new looking! That must be painfully obvious that I do not cook. Unless one calls “shamelessly ordering take-out” cooking. Which, probably not.
WHY WON’T SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHIIILLLDREN?!?
*wrings hands dramatically for several minutes*
Man, being sanctimonious makes me hungry.
Wait, now THAT looks like a book I would like! Retro lady, the word “secret” in the title, and I’m pretty sure no foodies would masturbate onto it.
Phew! I can make lunch after all.
Not really quite what I had in mind. I left my bitter pants upstairs, and while I like cookies, I’m pretty sure this won’t be too tasty.
Well, hel-lo lover…
Hooray! Even *I* can use the microwave! And look at the whimsical packaging! I can’t go wrong here.
Okay, dude, Pad Thai box, I sort of hate taking direction. Remember the whole “nursing school” fiasco?
Yeah, me too.
But lookit all the cute individually wrapped packages! How wee!
I can artfully arrange them JUST LIKE BEN! He’d be so proud of my technique! I should show him. Oh…right.
Man, Day 1 of school and I already miss him.
Posing the water next to my orchid is very artsy. Maybe I could be…a photo blogger.
And that’s ABOUT a cup. Close enough for me.
5! More! Flavors!
I might actually eat lunch properly again! O! Thank you, box of prepackaged Thai food!
Add the bag of noodles.
Wait. Um. That sauce looks semi-unappetizing.
But wait! Look! Whimsical packaging!!!
What was I saying again? I totally forgot.
Look at me all using the microwave like a big kid. Daver is going to be SO PROUD of me.
*hums Jeopardy song loudly*
Aww, yeah! END. I know what THAT means!
Maybe this is what will make my lunch more delicious: one more microwaved minute.
And just like that, I have noodles glued together with an unidentifiable sauce! I should TOTALLY WRITE A COOKBOOK. That’s EXACTLY what I should do! WRITE COOKBOOKS!
Uh, MOM? Hi. Are you a total idiot?