Before I get into the meat-n-butter of anything, I have to fling some confetti and bacon around. While the rest of the world was watching a very intoxicated James Franco (um, I’ll have what he’s having thankyouverymuch) on the Oscars last night, The 11th Annual Bloggie Winners were quietly announced.

Mommy Wants Vodka didn’t win. That? Was fine by me. Because Band Back Together did.

I’d started Mommy Wants Vodka in 2007 precisely because I’d so desperately craved the community I’d seen on other blogs and what I found was so much greater than I’d ever imagined. I’m the first person to mock blogging as narcissistic and self-absorbed but I’m also it’s number one fan. I’d totally wear a BLOGGING IS NUMBER ONE shirt while waving one of those NUMBER ONE fingers around in the air.

(mental note: pack NUMBER ONE finger for next conference)

Band Back Together represents all of the best bits of the blogging world: the community, the empathy, the story-telling, the feeling of same-ness, the support, the love and the compassion. A win for The Band is so much more important than anything else. Including bacon and sprinkles.

(I fully expect to be struck by a bolt of lightning from the bacon gods now)

So congrats and a big thank to everyone (and I do mean everyone. It’s not my site anymore. It belongs to The Band) who has worked to make the site what it is.

And watch out, World. The Band is just getting warmed up.

———-

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what I want to do next and I’ve realized that what I really need to do is to get some perspective. I need to blow the cobwebs and dust out of my brain and give my mind a chance to really wander.

It’s been so many years since I’ve really given myself a chance to do that. My choices have all been made with regard to the common good for so long that I don’t even know what I want anymore. I don’t even know how to begin to process what I want.

That means that I need to get out for a little bit. Live a little. Take a chance. Be brave; really brave. Do something different before I stagnate myself into actually believing that I do give a shit if my floors are clean enough to eat off of them.

I need to dust off my disco boots, fill my iPod until it’s bursting with new music, pack a bag and I need to go. I need to wander for awhile. Just me and the open road.

Someone mentioned in the comments that perhaps I wasn’t actually interested in self-publishing a book; that maybe I’d rather just take a “book tour” type of adventure, and I think that’s spot on. Shit, I’d love to write a book, but first, I’d rather know exactly what kind of book it is that I want to publish.

I need to go on an adventure, in search of My Happy. My Happy is out there somewhere, I know it. Perhaps it’s in a diner in New Mexico or a bar in Arizona or on a deserted street in Louisiana. I simply don’t know. But I intend to find out.

I’m tired of waking up and feeling bored by the drudgery of daily life. I’m tired of waiting for things to happen. I’m tired of praying that I’ll find my way; hoping that I’ll see a sign somewhere in the tea leaves. It’s time to make my OWN way.

It’s time find My Happy.

————–

I don’t have any timetable or route or any of those other “details” worked out yet. Hell, I still a laptop (and possibly a car) and a real, live companion to make this happen. In fact, I spent quite awhile convinced that Kansas City was actually a state (it is not a state)(nor is Las Vegas).

But I wanted to know where-ish you guys lived. Because if I’m taking a trip, it’s to visit with my Pranksters. You know how I’m always threatening to show up at your house drunk and warble “God Saves The Queen?” The time for that is soon.

Comments

comments

134 thoughts on “The Wanderer

  1. For our honeymoon we took our laptop, a map and a list of shit we wanted to see. We would book our room the night before and just make sure we got there. We had no itinerary and it was the best ever!!! As for where I live….Augusta. In about 5 weeks it will be crawling with golfing douchebags. Other than that it’s not too bad!

  2. You just let me know when you’ll be in the Charleston, SC area! And I’ll go on vacation….Nah! We’ll put you up! AND you get to hang with the college kids!

  3. As soon as this turns into your international wander make sure you hit Ottawa. Hell I’ll hold my roadtrip to Montreal for ya! (mmm smoked meat and shopping) okay maybe I’d do another roadtrip *g*

  4. As soon as this turns into your international wander make sure you hit Ottawa. Hell I’ll hold my roadtrip to Montreal for ya! (mmm smoked meat and shopping) okay maybe I’d do another roadtrip *g*

  5. I live in Ohio no wants to come to Ohio. We’re moving to Michigan hopefully by the end of the year. But I am not sure Michigan is better than Ohio but we’re building a house so YAY. And my husband got a huge big boss type job so Yay. But I too want to travel. You can stop and visit me ANY time. I’d love to be your traveling companion but those pesky 4 children no one wants. But I need a vacation that much I do know. So even a small road trip will do Ha.

    And YAY The Band deserved it. The Band has saved me immensely and I can never say how much I love you guys!!

    1. I’m in Ohio too, and actually a fan. We have beautiful parks, fun things to do, and are not expensive to visit. I’m near Akron, so come visit me anytime, Aunt Becky!

  6. I’m in south Carolina too, in It has two whole stoplights. It’s also smack dab in the bible belt and packed with fire and brimstone baptists and rednecks. I don’t fit in to say the least, so I could use the company. On the bright side, Ned’s has the best burgers and onion rings in the world, and there is a darling little bed and breakfast to retreat to. You’re welcome to crash on my couch, but my kids will definitely drive you to drink. That might not be a bad thing though 😉

    1. I don’t know what happened to my post…I wrote in a tiny town called Aynor, and it took that part out and made me look illiterate. Oh well, maybe I’ll fit in better with the rednecks that way.

  7. I currently live in NE PA, but come June I’m driving from PA to AZ, starting all over in a place where I’ll know very few people, and I’m both terrified and excited. You’re welcome to tag along, if you’d like to be in a little Camry trundling across the map!

    And what do you think, Funfetti cupcakes for the Band?

  8. I live in the middle of the mountains central/northern California. If you want more specifics cuz you’ll be around here, let me know.

  9. You and a whole band if pranksters need to come on down to chocolate city and we need to march right into the Capitol building with our Shut Your Whore Mouth shirts!!! I will show you all the sights – like the hotel where the mayor got caught smoking crack with the hooker and other shining glimpses of Americana. Cuz,ya know, if the government shuts down, itll be the only thing open.

  10. You and a whole band if pranksters need to come on down to chocolate city and we need to march right into the Capitol building with our Shut Your Whore Mouth shirts!!! I will show you all the sights – like the hotel where the mayor got caught smoking crack with the hooker and other shining glimpses of Americana. Cuz,ya know, if the government shuts down, itll be the only thing open.

  11. Before you travel I suggest that you check out ” the art of travel” by Allain de Botton. It helped me find my happiness, in the most unusuall way. It does not tell you where to go but how to enjoy where you are, even if it is a trip to your own room. It changes the way you see things, specially when travelling. He is a philosopher, not a travel agent, btw. I’m his fan for helping me see beauty.

  12. Southern California! Best. Weather. Anywhere. Also, April 2nd is Warrior Dash in Lake Elsinore, CA which is right down the road from me. http://www.warriordash.com/ That’s the first thing I’m doing to take a chance and be brave and find “me” again. You should totally meet me there!

      1. DUDE I have to agree with Heidster. I also live in SoCal and it’s pretty much amazing. Also… definintely consider Warrior Dash because if my fat ass can do it, you can do it.

        Also? It’s my birthday. Just sayin’ … we can cause general shenanigans.

        You are always welcome to show up on my doorstep warbling songs.

  13. Dust off your girliest cowboy boots and make sure you come up to Canada specifically Alberta We’ll show you a great time Good Luck wherever this journey takes you

    1. On yer way to Alberta, you can swing through Montana…. We have Montana is for Badasses shirts to layer with Shut Your Whore Mouth Shirts!

      Yay for the Band!

  14. Well, if it will ever stop god damn snowing, perhaps a visit to Montpelier, Vermont is just what you need (the only state capital without a McDonalds). Lots of hippies and trustfunders, farmers and rednecks….and a few normal people scattered here and there.

  15. Since I am apparently the ONLY reader you have (or who at least comments) who lives in Idaho, I can probably NOT count on you coming here. And I don’t drink so I can’t promise you a party anyway, now do I wear cowboy boots or sequins or a shut your whore mouth shirt. Damn. I am not pleading my case very well, am I? 🙂

  16. Regarding James Franco: Seriously I want whatever he was having next time I have to go to a family gathering. It’d make it so much easier to endure.

    Congrats on the Bloggie!

    There isn’t much to see where I am- northeast Arkansas… unless you wanted to get your picture in my hometown next to the “Welcome to Weiner” sign. Memphis is nearby though.

  17. I live just North of Nashville in Clarksville, TN. Come on over. We can compare our tummy tuck scars.

    And speaking of Vegas (you were, weren’t you?) 10 of your Merry Pranksters are meeting up there on March 21st for a week. You’re welcome to come join us. You’ll have to share a bed with one of us, but there’s a pool. And ummm…I don’t know what else. But it’ll be fun. It’s our yearly escape from our children and see our girlfriends that we live thousands of miles away from trip.

  18. Vancouver, Canada, eh? Hey … how do you spell Canada, like a Canuck?

    C, eh. N, eh. D, eh.

    But seriously, you would have to bring the beastlies. Because I have 3 beastlies too. And I could keep them busy while The Daver and you go out to all the coolest spots in Vancouver. Aaaaand we could all go out together, and terrorise the locals.

  19. Congrats on the Bloggie. That is fab. You need to get your out-board motor or your jet propelled wings fitted if you want to come and see me in Wales. Then I’ll confuse you with my Northern Irish accent and you’ll feel completely all at sea.

    I might not be selling this as well as I could.

  20. Congrats on the Bloggie. That is fab. You need to get your out-board motor or your jet propelled wings fitted if you want to come and see me in Wales. Then I’ll confuse you with my Northern Irish accent and you’ll feel completely all at sea.

    I might not be selling this as well as I could.

  21. Fort Collins, CO, baby. We have BREWERIES here. Multiple. The door is open, we even have a spare bed. I’m dead fucking serious.
    I am having the same zest for “a purpose”. I like to call it my Vision Quest.
    Maybe we just need to get all Eat, Pray, Love together. ??

    1. That kind of came off like a lesbian advance. It was not intended that way.
      …Reason # 578 supporting why I need more sleep: accidental and misdirected sexual innuendos.

  22. Becky — Hurray for you — and for the Band.
    You kick it, girl.
    First visit (or last) — Naperville. I’m here. Would love to meet you. Keep writing. Keep blogging.
    Your fan,
    Sue

    1. I’m in Utah too! We have a guest room with tomatoes growing in it, they would love some company and I would too. I live with my husband and two of his brothers and it would be fun to have another female in the house! 😀

  23. NORCAL baby! Great weather, home to the California State Fair. And, in our house we drink LOTS of wine and an extra screaming kid or two would make no difference. 🙂

  24. Hey Aunt Becky! I would surely love to put you up, or take you out salsa dancing, or go to the Keys and drink heavily with you… I’m here in Miami. Feel free to drop by! Really, really. You are welcome anytime! 🙂

  25. Whoot! Congratulations on the Bloggie for The Band! Way to go! You have made such a huge impact on so many people’s lives – it’s great to see that recognized. 🙂

    Metrowest Boston area, baby. Got a bunch of your Pranksters within a short ride from here….. c’mon, you know you wanna…

  26. OhOhOh..AND… I totally have a gay…AND he’s only 23…AND we go to the local gay clubs all the time…AND we wanna take our Aunt Becky!

  27. I live in a very small town in central Kentucky (Versailles, pronounced ver-sales. Not the silly French way). We have bourbon distilleries, crazy rednecks, a totally banging hippie music festival at a farm called Terrapin Hill, and a mother fucking castle (a REAL CASTLE!!!). We also DON’T have a wal-mart (which I consider a win…until I want to buy a glittery head band at 3am). Obviously, you need no further reason to come here.

  28. Well, if you want to come to Nebraska, we’re here until August. Then we MAY be leaving the f-bomb snow and going to Naples, Italy. And if we go THERE, you so totally need to take a road trip (with an assist by a boat or plane or hover craft) to come see me. We would rock Italy.

  29. Charleston, sc, baby! The girls are allowed to dance on the bar and the seafood is off the boat and on your plate! There’s a gay bar, the citadal, 2 military bases and the best beaches anywhere! I have a couch or i’ll kick a parasite out and you can have their bed!

  30. Charleston, sc, baby! The girls are allowed to dance on the bar and the seafood is off the boat and on your plate! There’s a gay bar, the citadal, 2 military bases and the best beaches anywhere! I have a couch or i’ll kick a parasite out and you can have their bed!

  31. I’m outside St. Louis and you haven’t lived until you’ve been up in the Arch, and seen the stereotypical East St. Louis from Vacation come alive. Also, we have Budweiser and toasted ravioli, so nourishment is taken care of (although that’ll shoot your Weight Watchers points straight to infinity).
    Congrats on the well-deserved Bloggie!

  32. Portland OR, Baby! It is a vibrant, amazing and funky city! We have a grassroots movement here to “Keep Portland Weird”, a slightly funny television show about us AND a bakery that sells Bacon Doughnuts!!! Plus, there is a legion of us who think you are FuckAwesome and have “Shut your Whore Mouth” t-shirts.

  33. I am in Mihcigan in metro Detroit. Detroit isn’t really as scary as most people think, if you’re in the right areas. Ann Arbor is pretty cool, but we have some of the most amazing scenery when you get to the top of the mitten and beyond. Check out Tequamenon Falls, Sleeping Bear dunes. My mom is one a work/traveling trip right now and she said when she went to Zion nat’l park in Utah, she cried.
    Hilton Head island is cool, So is hawaii.

    You can stay with us if you come to Detroit, we have an extra room, but Hubby calls it the music room. It’s sound proof 🙂

  34. Congrats on the win! Score! That’s awesome and totally well-deserved.

    If you want to come visit, I make a fabulous (Bearded) Clam Chowder. I live in Florida. For now. And then Hong Kong. That’s far.

  35. On your way from Vancouver to Ottawa stop in at our place near Toronto. By then the pool will be open 😉
    I may not drink anymore but I know how to ply others with booze to satisfy my need to party hard through others!!
    I can promise you a plethra of drunken rednecks then onto downtown Toronto for the gay district which truly ROCKS.

  36. Aunt Becky, I think this would be PERFECT for you!

    I’m from good ol’ Oklahoma, but I’m not exactly sure where I’ll be when you set out on this adventure. There really isn’t much here besides museums so if that’s not your cup of tea just stop by, pick me up, and take me with you 🙂

    Mallori

    1. Ha! I’m from the great state of OK too! I was totally gonna lie and drag her here with promises of teepees and dirt and no electricity but since you mentioned museums, I guess I can’t do that. But OH!! Becky we have tornados!!! We can sit on the porch and watch ’em!!!

    2. Ha! I’m from the great state of OK too! I was totally gonna lie and drag her here with promises of teepees and dirt and no electricity but since you mentioned museums, I guess I can’t do that. But OH!! Becky we have tornados!!! We can sit on the porch and watch ’em!!!

  37. Well, I live just south of Schaumburg, so I can’t help you with the road trip (unless it’s a really short one!), but congrats on the award! What a great brainchild!

    Sounds like you are going to have an adventurous year. The day to day grind can get really old. It especially drags in the winter around here (ENOUGH snow already!!), but it sounds like you’re on your way to finding happy. Good for you!

  38. There is nothing like road-tripping to really center yourself. It’s my dream to eventually cover all of my own particular home and native land, from Victoria B.C. to St. John Newfoundland. So far I’ve gotten as far as Quebec City and Fort Frances ON (by car, anyway).

    Congratulations on the Bloggie for Band Back Together. I’ve really enjoyed reading and contributing.

  39. I’m on Maui. Have a spare room. Right now, there’s no major street noise and the birds are chirpin’ their various tunes (cardinal, sparrow, mynah, doves, chickens – one rooster). It is presently 74 degrees in my house at 444pm. Sun sets about 615pm. Rises about 7am.

    Sprinkle the magic dust and come on over to the islands. Alaskan Air just cut fares to $159 one way here from west coast cities. (News story here: http://www.hawaiinewsnow.com/Global/story.asp?S=14158300)

    If the magic dust doesn’t work for long distances, here’s some inspiration:

    “You are what your deep, driving desire is.
    “As your desire is, so is your will.
    “As your will is, so is your deed.
    “As your deed is, so is your destiny.

    “You would be what your destiny is.”
    The Upanishads – translated by Eknath Easwaran

    Blessings to you always ~

  40. YAY!!! I am glad the band won I totally voted for it!! I live on Marine Corps base Camp Pendleton right now you can show up here drunk holding a package of bacon and I won’t bat an eyelash at you!! We are fixing to PCS to Tampa though so you might have to be drunk in Fl instead of Ca. At least if you lose your pants(from drunkeness) you will still be warm in either place!!

  41. I’m so excited for Band Back Together. Totally deserving!

    I’m in the Orlando area now…but maybe not for long (plans plans plans) or maybe for a long time. It is all very up in the air right now. Maybe I should go ahead and put in for your roadtrip assistant. You know you need one 😉

  42. 30 miles east of Seattle in a town called Snoqualmie. Actually, it was a town, now it’s a suburb. A suburban hell. Complete with cookie cutter houses (“my house is the the house that looks like that house that looks like that house over there”) and a millitant HOA (No garden gnomes? Screw that, I have an army of garden gnomes and they’re EVIL). One more nasty note about clover in my yard and I’ll platnt a freakin’ pink plastic flamigo in that clover. I fully expect to get kicked out anyday.

    PS. Today my response to anybody asking me anything was “Mommy Wants Vodka”. It really confused the guy at Target.

  43. San Francisco baby!! You can sleep on my couch (it’s quite comfy) or Jack’s bed if he’s not here (although I’d love for you to meet him).

    We’ll put flowers in your hair and all that. We’ll go dancing in the Castro where everything is FABULOUS. 😉

    Come to Califorrrrrrnia.

  44. We’re always up for a rendition of ‘God Save the Queen’ here in England. OK, so we’re about the least patriotic nation going and aren’t actually that fussed about the anthem but we’d get excited if Aunt Becky sings it!

    Not sure that crossing the atlantic counts as a road trip though…

    1. Especially if it’s the sex pistols version! And I second this. COME TO ENGLAND AUNT BECKY!!! You have a More than willing tour guide here 😀

  45. I just found your blog(s) yesterday, and I am fascinated. Love the way you write. I live to the west of Indianapolis. There is a spare bedroom that you would have to share with an affectionate Australian Shepherd named Gracie. She sheepherds. Anyhooo, do ya think it’s also the weather and time of year, cause I am so sick of snow, ice, cold, and grey skies. The longing for blue and warmth is also pushing me to get out and go. Just a thought!

  46. Well…I haven’t been around here long enuf to become a prankster I suppose, but after one trip here I know I’ll be back. You have two things going for you besides your writing. The Pioneer Woman speaks well of you and…I love the blog’s name…

    Oh…north Georgia mountains, BTW.

  47. I live about half an hour outside of D.C. and anytime you want to stop by feel free. I have a spare bedroom with it’s OWN bathroom (it’s new). Also, two little boys that are always excited when someone comes to stay at the house. So far it’s only been their grandparents.

    I totally voted for your blog, and Band Back Together. I’m so glad it won. I hope you find your happy. I’m still looking for mine.

    1. I’m still searching for my happy too!

      Aunt Becky,

      You should totally come to the East Coast. I live in Richmond, VA. It’s about two hours south of DC, two hours west of VA Beach, and two hours from the Shenandoah Mountains.

  48. You are absolutely welcome in Seattle and/or Scotland. We’re back and forth all the time. Good luck becky, and congratulations for Band Back Together.

  49. Aunt Becky you 100% must come to Atlanta to see me and Jana! We will take you out and help you live it up! And I will even wear my Shut Your Whore Mouth t-shirt the entire time you’re here. And glitter paint! And I’ll make you bacon galore!

  50. Congratulations to Band Back!!!

    And of course if you want to visit Barcelona (Spain) we will welcome you with open arms. Our local “bacon” is actually big smoked ham hanging from the ceiling in the bars. That will inspire you for sure.
    un abrazo
    anne

  51. A book tour without the book. Brilliant. I’d love to do one of those too. You could probably conference your way around the country. Speak and get some shit for free!

    I am in itty bitty Bloomington Indiana. And you are welcome to come here and check out the local wildlife (i.e. fine young college males) with me. But if there are enough pranksters for you to crash in Indianapolis, I’d totally come drink vodka (or hell, starbucks) with you up there.

    We do have Chic-fil-a’s here.

  52. Congrats on/to the Band!!

    We’re in MD, Frederick/Washington county (looking to buy a house soon though) and you are more than welcome to hang with us anytime/day/holiday!!

  53. OK, when you stop in New Mexico, there is a pretty decent diner on the east side of Clovis, but hold your nose when you drive through Bovina, TX…it smells of cattle.

    And if you get back around to Kansas City…I live a few miles southeast in Spring Hill, KS.

  54. Drop some Kansas into your iPod, Carry On Wayward Son is a great road trippin tune, that and some Steve Miller Band.

    I can safely say that Mr. Happy in NOT in a bar in Phoenix AZ.
    Mr. Racist and Mr. Hateful Biggot however are availible….just incase you feel the need to kick some shit head in the balls.

  55. I’m on a farm in the middle of Kansas. If you find you’ll be heading down I-70 between Denver and Kansas City, come spend a night at the farm! Kansas State University is just a few miles away, with a GREAT college bar district! And I’d be happy to “meat” up with you in Kansas City (not a state)for some fun! Road trips are the BEST way to get your groove back! I just turned 40, and I’m working on mine.

  56. Ohoh Becky! I could have written that post!! In fact, I already wrote it in my head. I am a wanderer in my mind, and I NEED to get out and see/do/experience things! It’s like every day I am one foot closer to the grave and I haven’t SEEN enough!! Anyway, if I sound like a crazy person, sorry. I’m not really. I just feel you. Not in a weird way. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Or maybe there is. Just ignore me.

    Anyway, I live in upstate NY. You are welcome to stop on over at any time! Maybe we could go look at striped cows, or pick apples, or walk along the plain old boring old country streets that have been my home for my entire life.

    Anytime Aunt B! 🙂

  57. welllll, i’m currently in the orlando area but hope to be back on long island, new york this spring. depending where i am when you embark on your quest, i have tons of ideas for things to do.

  58. Southern California has to be included on a trip to find something when you’re not really sure what you’re looking for…I mean, we’ve got swimming pools and movie stars for gods sake! But I’d recommend waiting a few months…the weather is hardly all California sunshiny at the moment.
    And someone else said Zion Nat’l park which I also recommend…absolutely gorgeous…I also saw tons of people from other countries…if people travel that far to see a Nat’l park it has to be pretty awesome right?
    And if you hit Montreal get a Poutine with your smoked meat…it’s like Canada’s version of chili fries and it. Is. Amazing.
    (My mom didn’t get to travel with her family growing up since they couldn’t afford it so we did A LOT of traveling when I was younger.)

  59. Oh Becky…bless your heart. Wish we could hit the road together because I truly believe that every woman with a gypsy soul needs to let that gypsy run free if at all possible. So…you go girl. I’m in north Texas and there’s lots of shenanigans to be had here (although I’d rather be making my own shenanigans elsewhere, dontcha know!) BTW, I just subscribed to your blog and my little code letters (to make sure I wasn’t a computer) were boussn which I read as boozin’. Ha! Take care little lady!

    1. Yes! Definitely Philly! Depending on timing, I’m either halfway between New York City and Philly, or right outside of Philly. Either way, full of the win!

  60. Come visit, girl! My sofabed is yours!

    YAY for Band Back Together! I have a possible BBT post swirling in my brain. I’ll try to start typing it out soon.

    Love ya!

  61. I checked out Band Back Together after reading this post, and I’m so glad I did. I suffered a miscarriage last year and it was nice to read stories form other women about their miscarriage. Finally I felt I wasn’t alone and that the grief I’m still experiencing is normal. Congrats on the award you deserve it. 🙂

  62. Congrats Aunt Becky on your success and the bandback2gether award. You and the ladies at band have made the internet something most thought not possible – meaningful, helpful, warm, happy, and important.

    I’d like to tell those Bloggie people how stupid they were not naming mommywantsvodka best blog ever but I’ll just shut my whore mouth.

  63. Redneck Central is somewhere in the Southeastern US. It may or may not be within spittin’ distance of The Middle of Nowhere, North-ish Ga.

    You’re welcome to visit, if you don’t mind dust critters, craptastic housekeeping, cats, a new baby, fried food with gravy, and (depending on time of year) tiny mosquitoes with huge attitudes and no sense of personal space.

    We even have indoor plumbing!

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K

  64. Congrats on the win – full of the awesomesauce!

    When you get your wandering wings on, fly on down to Western Australia. With gorgeous beaches, yummy food and beautiful wineries we’ll show ya a fantastic time – you just might have to put up with mad cats, chooks and hit-and-miss housecleaning.

    Have a fabbo time on your wanderings tho xo

  65. You could come to Australia! Best to come when its stinking hot (November – March) and all the drop bears are hibernating. xx

  66. If you manage to rock up drunk and warble-like at my front door, I will let you and your merry car of pranksters in and GIVE YOU ANOTHER DRINK! And probably about eleventy-five-hundred afterwards. Because you will have managed to drive the entire bottom of the Pacific Ocean (deep crevices and all) and THAT? Deserves extra booze.

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