How did you guys not tell me this existed until YESTERDAY?

Furthermore, HOW DID NONE OF YOU BUY ME THIS?

You Shut Your Whore Mouth When Dr. House Is Talking

On second thought, don’t buy me this. I’d NEVER sleep again. Ever. In fact, I may never sleep again knowing that it exists: I have more questions than can possibly be answered.

THIS is why mommy wants needs vodka.