My life is complete.

This is what brought people to my blog today, in the wee hours of this morning.

Jimmy Wales Wikipedia stop begging for money
Jimmy Motherfucking Wales!

Jimmy Wales, founder of Wikipedia (that’s probably how he probably signs his checks)(I sign mine, Becky Sherrick Harks, Mummy Hunter Extraordinaire, ESQ)(don’t judge, Pranksters), it appears that I am not the only one who has a problem with your “I’m Judging You As You Search Wikipedia For ‘Vagina Itch'” eyes.

(here’s my aside: why don’t you get a puppy to stare cutely at me instead? I’d be more inclined to give money to a puppy than to you.)

2011, I’m already humping your leg.

27 thoughts on “2011: You’re Officially Off To A Good Start

  1. Ummmm what people search for to get to your blog scares me. But Jimmy Wales also scares the shit out of me. Every time I see him I no longer want to go to Wikipedia but they have ALL the mother facts dammit. It’s bullshit. Damn You Jimmy Wales.

      1. OMG if that’s only the top 10. How do you sleep at night? Do you have nightmares cause the top 10 kinda make me wanna go to the corner and rock and weep. It’s so cold.

  2. We actually had a teacher in our building who DID sign her name: Mrs. Name, NBCT
    National Board Certified Teacher

    Mind you, she SUCKED as a teacher. As with all certifications, it’s a bunch of tests, portfolios, and BS. But she wrote it on EVERYTHING, including little notes home to parents.

    The teacher across the hall from me was about to retire so he started signing his name: Mr. Name, R

    I miss him.

  3. The thought of being able to see how people are stumbling over my blog scares me. The last popular one for me was ‘ass parades’ someone was mighty disappointed by the time they got to my site!

  4. I like to imagine that they’re not individual key words that lead people to me, but dead on phrases that I have used that connect us in a terrible terrible way. And then I get, “Granny fucking a tree branch,” and I sick myself out.


      I laugh because it’s so, so true. I can’t see anything past the first ten or so and really, that’s enough. I don’t need to see it.

      But MAN, there have been times that I’ve laughed, but mostly, I’ve gotten barfy. BLECH.

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