…google “cheeseburger crotch not pregnant,” apparently this brings you to my doorstep. While I normally am thrilled to pieces to have new visitors and virtually meet new people, I’m not sure this would be the place you’d want to look for such a thing.

Color me stupid, but I have no idea what a cheeseburger crotch (pregnant or not) is (but this is a highly trafficked term here at Casa de la Sausage).

And I don’t want to.

(okay, maybe I do. But I’m kinda sicked out now.)

How did YOU get here?

(Confidential to the person who found me searching for “i m just living for my kids i have nothing to offer my husband,” that may be the most depressing search term I’ve ever heard.)

Comments = full of the awesome. Like gravy. I can haz an RSS RSS feed .

31 Responses to If You…

  • Tracy says:

    I think the only safe depiction of a not pregnant cheeseburger crotch that I can imagine is an animated one.

    Actually… that’s still pretty creepy. Uck!

    I’m not sure how I got here. I think through some swirling vortex of blogroll linkiness somewhere or other.

    I get a number of people searching for “mantras to control my husband” at my place. Hmm. It may be time to come up with some…

  • Valerie says:

    I got here a few days ago via The Flying Rat (Jenn). So, hello!

  • Jenn says:

    I found you blog surfing one night, you know, where you read one blog, then read their blogroll and then the next blogroll. And I am so glad that I found you – you say exactly what I am thinking!

  • shay says:

    How do you find out what people used to search you?
    AND ewwwwwwww! NASTY (to quote my four year old)

    I did the rabbit hole blog link thing and found you. No fun search – sorry!

    Oh and what happened with the dime? I’d probably just use it cuz I’m not a saver and would forget.

  • Angela says:

    Dude, I came here by way of fajita armpit not impotent. Totally.

  • becky says:

    I found you through KC! I think she left a comment on my blog, then I started reading hers… and I checked out her blogroll at one point. I’m so glad I found you, though! I love to read local blogs… especially those from Chicago since I miss it so much :(

  • Doc says:

    I found you through Karen’s blog… (Not trying to give you a big headbut) I must admit you are a must read every day. I love the way you describe things and your view of teh world….

    (I have a bunch of odd things that people search to find my blog too)

  • Frozen Star says:

    I clicked a link at Baby on Bored, because I thought the name ‘Mommy wants vodka’ was amusing…

  • Amy says:

    I found you through Denise at The Woman With Hobbit Feet, and I’m so glad that I did!

  • Kim says:

    I found you from another’s blogroll,thank God!

    Ok, a question for you…..

    1. i love my job

    2. i love the people i work with

    3. i’m really unhappy with my raise

    4. first reaction is to get pissy and act a fool

    5. second reaction is to be all hurt (cuz EYE YAM)

    6. third reaction is to speak calmly to boss and explain why I feel like I just got kicked in the stomach

    7. what i will probably settle on is just being upset and quiet for a couple of days (here at work), and being really vocal at home.

    8. i swear I could just cry, and that is not typically me…..

    i guess it was not a question at all, just needed to take up some of my Aunty Becky’s space to vent….as always, thanks for the space.

  • As American as Apple Pie says:

    I found you through Doc & Mt Cat’s blog. I love your views and outlook on life. Looking forward to reading more.

  • KC says:

    I found you through uranus.

  • Cricket says:

    Cheeseburger crotch might even make me eat pussy.

  • Pauline says:

    I came here by way of Becky is the coolest hot mama around. Totally.

  • Doc says:

    Oh she it hot too???? B O N U S !!!

  • Joann says:

    I found you by Surfing blog’s
    Glad I did it’s a have to read daily thing now,
    I do it every day.

  • Jenn says:

    You know.. I can’t remember how I first got here. I think you left a comment on another blog that I read and I just clicked through that way and was hooked immediately!
    I’ve been found by some interesting search terms in the past, haha. My settings are now such that I cannot be googled.

  • KT says:

    how do you know what people search for to find you?

  • becky says:

    KT, I have a stat counter program that The Daver installed for me ages ago for me to check out what freaks search for AND find on my blog. It’s hysterical, really. I think blogspot has something similar, try googling “site meter” and I think you can put it on your blog. Not sure if it gives you search terms, but it probably does.

  • Jerseygirl89 says:

    I think I saw “Mommy Wants Vodka” on someone’s blogroll and thought, “Damn! I bet that’s a great blog!”

    So good to be right.

  • Hmm, I think from Dead Baby Jokes – but since then I have been a regular to both blogs.

  • kate says:

    um…roundabout. someone commented on my blog, and then six blogs later, linked through comments here i am. i swear. seriously, i’m the cheeseburge crotch gal.

  • Dawn says:


  • Victoria says:

    I found Google Analytics a couple of weeks ago and it frackin’ scared the shitola outta me.


  • Juli says:

    Blood & Thunder sent me here as a gift to you.

    I hope you like me. Cuz the receipt, she is long gone.

  • Kristine says:

    I’m a boring followed a link from a comment you made on another blog.

    I also have some odd searches, but I think cheeseburger crotch takes the cake.

  • Denise says:

    I cannot recall how I made my way here, but I’m so happy I did! You make me laugh and I love that.

  • Sarah says:

    I got here by searching “cheeseburger crotch” on google. I’m prego and I was looking for a definition to give my sister when I mentioned it. Oh god, I have no shame left.

  • Colin P says:

    From TJ.

  • MissHannah says:

    because I saw your awesome wedding cake while catching up with “Cake Wrecks” blog.Then read some, and some more, and now working through them all.

    Because although I am three years or so late, I really relate to what you are saying.

  • Angela says:

    I came here from TheMompetition, which I found when someone posted one of the videos on Facebook.

    I read a few of your newest entries and decided they were so GD hilarious that I had to go back and read them all!

    By the way, the stress purging thing? I thought I was the only one!

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