Now I’m just going to out and say it: I get fat when I’m pregnant. It doesn’t seem to matter if I spend my days cradling the porcelain god with all my might or eating a box of cupcakes a day. Bottom line is, I gain between 50-70 pounds with my babies.

Now, the first time I got pregnant, I told myself I’d breastfeed whatever pesky pounds were left once I dropped around 40 pounds at the hospital. I’d be back in my size 6’s within a couple of weeks!

Breastfeeding didn’t work out for us so well and it took nearly 3 years (admittedly 3 years wherein I didn’t exactly diet it off) to get back down to my prepregnancy weight. But I did get down there.

Breastfeeding DID work out with Alex after over nine months of puking my brains out and eating like an anorexic bird still piled 60 pounds onto my frame, so I told myself that the fat would melt off me!

Har-dee-har-fucking-har.

Between Weight Watchers and chasing Alex around the house, I managed to get within 15 pounds of my pregnancy weight before getting pregnant again (3 times, but who’s counting?).

Making a conscious effort not to flip the shit out over my weight and vowing to enjoy the shit out of each and every milkshake that passed through my yawning maw, I ignored the scale this time around. Until about 2 weeks ago when out of morbid curiosity, I stupidly trundled onto it.

I have been depressed ever since.

But, rather than sitting around and moping from room to room, sighing deeply and looking morose, I got off my ass today (to be fair, I’d been waiting on my 6 week post-partum visit to start this diet. Which happened at 8 weeks and on this past Friday) and rejoined Weight Watchers.

I have a long road and about 60-odd pounds to lose, but I’m giving myself an entire 2 years to do it rather than wean my daughter early (read: tomorrow). I’ll do my best for her and try my hardest not to kill myself that I cannot drop the LBS like they’re hot.

(ed note: they are NOT hot)

Breastfeeding and weight loss combined just don’t come easily to me like they do for some other people because I am speshul.

So goes nothing. 60+ pounds. 2 years. And a desire to look less like an Oompa-Loompa. Or John Wayne Gacy (post partum hair loss! SWEET!).

Anybody with me? Any good tips?

Comments = full of the awesome. Like gravy. I can haz an RSS RSS feed .

51 Responses to Fattykins

  • BB says:

    Breastfeeding did not work for me either. With my first 3 pregnancies, I gained 60-70 lbs as well, and it took forever to get back to withing 20 lbs of where I started. To be fair, I was 18 and 110 lbs when I got pregnant the first time. My last pregnancy I gained about 35 lbs, and I was sick the whole time, plus 20 months post partum, so I didn’t have the whole I need to lose the weight problem. I was in the opposite boat with trying to gain weight. Now, the weight has started to come back on, quickly, and I am in need of a good exercise routine, or something to help me get back into shape.

    I have heard great things about the Weight Watchers program. I think giving yourself a 2 year time frame is an excellent goal. Especially since you are nursing. I think it is all about moderation. You can have a little of anything, as long as it is truly a little bit. Good Luck!

  • Kendra says:

    Way to go, especially on the 2-year goal. I tend to gain 20-30 pounds per kid, and I completely stressed over the scale every time: from the early weight loss that came with testing me for ketones, to the later visits when I could not consume enough calories to sustain me, so I freaked out that I just kept gaining weight. After #1, I lost weight and was about 20 pounds below my prepregnancy weight fairly quickly (but that was still a good 40 pounds overweight). So I considered myself special and lucky that breastfeeding really was this magical elixir. Imagine my shock when, after #2 was born, I didn’t really lose any weight. So I sobbed into my pillow and bought bigger jeans. Now, a year or so after #3 was born, I’ve accepted that there’s not going to be a miracle. I’m about where I was when I got pregnant with #2, but I’ve spent several years waiting for the magic to kick in to get me light as a feather, because sitting on your ass and eating pizza is the universally accepted way to lose weight.

    I get unmotivated and frustrated. I think WW is fantastic, and when I did use it years ago, after college, I loved it. If you lose the weight slow, you’re way more likely to keep it off, and if you set a realistic goal, you’re way more likely to get there.

    Let me know how it works out. Maybe it’s time for me to suck it up and join too; I’m certainly not making any progress on my own.

  • Danielle says:

    I have no assvice, I’m doing my best to lose my last 20 pounds and my “baby” is 5 years old. My husband is going to whip my ass into shape and help me workout. It won’t be fun…he already made me run a mile on Friday. I was panting like a dying dog, but I did die…I say SUCCESS! Good job and good luck!!!

  • Heather P. says:

    One thing that I loved when I did WW was V8 juice. A 12 oz can is ZERO points and is a nice filling snack and gets you your vegetable serving points. I SO need to get back on WW!
    Good luck!

  • Io says:

    Not hot my ASS.

    Er, that might be my hot 60 weighing in there.

    I second the V8 juice. Mostly because I love it – especially the hot and spicy version. And the best dessert is frozen blueberries eaten with chopsticks.

  • Oh dude . . . all I can say is I’m with you. With both pregnancies I hit points on the scale I NEVER thought I would see. With the first, it took a good 2 years to get it off. With the second, it took a year, then it came back. Still battling with it and I haven’t been pregnant in 6 years. Shit.

  • zelzee says:

    You gain weight during pregnancy.
    I gain weight during cancer. (steroids).

    I like your end result much better!

    DO NOT stress over the weight gain. It will come off. You are very smart to set a long term goal. I have found counting calories and dancing around my house (like a lunatic with with a congo beat stuck in her brain) works the best for me.

    Know what else works best for me?
    Throw out your scale!
    They are evil.

  • Ms. Moon says:

    Weight Watchers worked so well for me that I eventually went to work for them. I don’t now, but it is a good and sensible program and you know you’ll lose the weight doing it.
    I never lost weight through breastfeeding except for after my first baby and I was all of 21 years old then. Subsequent babies? Aah. Not so much.
    But you’re doing the right thing.
    And remember- nine months to get there, nine months to get back.
    At least.
    Be patient with yourself and the process. It will happen.

  • Angellee says:

    2 years!!! I wish I was so fortunate!! I am right with you except my horribly depressing place of employment grants me ONE YEAR from baby’s birthday to do the deed. Granted the baby isn’t born yet- nor is he on time… besides the point/ I have ONE year to lose 69 farking pounds. and that is at the LEAST pending I can keep my little paws out of the goodies until my child gets here!!!! Those dirty bastards pick a magical weight and tell me what I get to weigh! I wish you great luck at weight watchers and just think- Summer is coming so there will be more to do outside!!!

  • stacey says:

    I’m so speshul I put *on* weight while breastfeeding. I craved greasy fatty food and sweet fatty food and creamy fatty food and ….anything fatty…if it wasn’t fried in oil, smothered in cream or full of butter I wasn’t interested.

    I second getting rid of the scale. those numbers just stress you out. find a pair of pants that are a bit to tight. Try them on now and then. Once they fit find another pair and work your way down to your pre pregnancy pants.

    I’m not so good at dieting but WW helped me a get a grip on portion size. Mostly what kicked weightloss into gear for me was exercising. took a me a couple months to get into it but once I did I’ve kept doing it 4 years later

  • Lola says:

    I’m with you, except I’m only giving myself two months. Granted, I wasn’t just pregnant. I was just a big old sow stuffing my face all winter. No matter. Fat is fat, and it must go away. V-8 is one of my tricks, too. That stuff fills me up just right, and salt is my lover!

    Don’t even get on the scale, girl. Go by your clothes and how you feel or you’ll be so disappointed. Scales are evil!!!

  • Sandy says:

    Give me about 6 months and I will TOTALLY be with you on this one! I was down to my pre-pregnancy weight before I started trying to make # 3. The depression and fertility drugs packed on 30 pounds even before the second line on the test finally showed up 17 months later. So if I add on the 40 or 50 that I know I’ll gain while pregnant – then I’ll have about 70 or 80 to lose in about 6 months. Wow…that’s depressing.

  • Eva says:

    For me breastfeeding was the only thing that’s ever really worked. I lost like 30 lbs. from my pre-pregnancy weight and have only managed like 7 since weaning. Sooooo…no advice. Um, it’s easier if you’re vegetarian and avoid specific ingredients, I think. But don’t be hard on yourself. YOU JUST HAD A BABY FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

  • Holli says:

    My sister lost a shit ton of baby weight doing Atkins. Breast feeding didn’t do it for her either. When I had my first I weighted 135 pounds when I went in to give birth. Since then I’ve battled PCOS and let’s just say the horomones are winning. I would kill to weigh 135 right now.

  • Amanda says:

    I was drawn to your blog by mention of vodka (I have been drawn to many a locale by such lures, with mixed results), and it has delivered marvelously. I love the two posts I’ve read so far, and find that we have a frightening amount in common (aside from the fact that your blog is much better than mine . . .).

    I have no real advice on the baby weight thing. My daughter is adopted (or will be soon, she’s my step, but I’m her only mommy . . . whatever). I’m almost as terrified of what’s going to happen to my body if I manage to get pregnant in a year when we try as I am that we won’t be able to get pregnant.

    Look forward to reading more! Best of luck with your weight loss quest. You have done it before, I’m sure you can do it again!

  • a says:

    I lost all my baby weight while breastfeeding – even though I required copious amounts of all the sugar I was denied due to being borderline gestationally diabetic. Then I stopped breastfeeding right around the time my daughter started walking (so no more long walks with the stroller). So, I gained 10 lbs back. 2 years seems like an optimistic goal from that kind of perspective!

    Of course, things would work better if I stopped spending every night on the couch with the TV and the computer!

  • Lainey-Paney says:

    Get a Wii.
    That’s my tip.
    May sound corny….but seriously, I’m not the hit-the-gym gal.
    We got a Wii & stayed up late playing one night. The next day—I was so flipping sore. I used muscles I didn’t even know that I had!

    Last Tuesday I was playing it with my dad & then later with my neighbor. My armpits were sore. My ARMPITS. Are you kidding me???

    It’s fun, and it’s interactive.
    And, I could be wrong, but I think it’s cheaper than a gym membership. And—you don’t have to get dressed to play it. I do it in my jammies.

  • Donna says:

    I’m with you I need to lose 70-80 lbs too and on the verge of I’ll try anything. Thanks guys for the V8 tip and it is filling just never entered my mind to get it. My problem is I’m disabled so I can’t do regular exercise I need to find something for the disabled to do from a chair. Keep up the good work and let us know how things are going.

  • Jenn says:

    You and I both know how I feel about those bitches at WW. My only suggestion is to find a leader that you like. Somebody told me that once. But I don’t like any of them here so…yeah. I dropped out.

    At my very last weigh-in ever, I lost about half a pound after being all OCD all week long (read: weighing myself before AND after taking a dump) and the leader said to me “Well, this isn’t Biggest Loser. What did you expect?”

    Good luck. I’ll be waiting in the wings with cupcakes.

  • CJ says:

    I gained 40+ pounds while carrying my son. Now I’m 13ish pounds above my pre-pregnancy weight and have been hovering here since he was about two months old. He is a year old, and I’ve been breastfeeding since birth.

    I absolutely despise the flab around my belly, but I’ve found that a big bowl of chocolate mudslide ice cream usually makes me feel better.

    Good luck!

  • Megan says:

    New to your blog, but I have an 8 week old lil’ boy and am fighting the fat monster as well. I gained right about 50 pounds (60 with my older son.)

    Isn’t it lovely? I’m a big fan of Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred DVD. I was pretty sore the first few days I did the first level. Oh, and wandered into weight watchers myself. Fabulous. :( (I hate commiserating with others, but the damn program does work.)

    Love the writing, keep it up. Feel the pain with the baby weight. And the actual baby and kids thing. Keep all that up to. :)

    Best, m.

  • Good job setting a realistic goal, first of all, and for picking a great program that definitely works with breast feeding moms. Now, chomp those carrot sticks while Amelia is breastfeeding! Also, do you have any Baby and Me workout DVDs or access to any such classes? That’s a great way to not skip workouts.

    Definitely wish you all the luck as you get kick this off!

  • mandy says:

    I can relate. I weighed more after my pregnancy than I did during this last time around. Don’t be depressed. I encourage you to document it, because in some interesting way it keeps me accountable. Until I tell you my secret and that is that I have gained a little since my last post. Anyway, this isn’t about Meeee, is it?

    I think if you can take a few minutes for yourself every few days to go for a walk or something that gets you moving too, it will be helpful for the inside and outside. Having said that, I haven’t been on MY treadmill in about 3 weeks..but who’s counting anyway?
    I can tell you, I felt better when I knew I was doing at least something physical. I know weight watchers is a great program and isn’t so restricting you feel like you are missing out too much.

    Best to you with everything.

  • Cari says:

    Oh, I am with you. Kind of. I mean, I’m with you on the needing to lose the baby weight part, but I pretty much suck at the dieting and exercise thing. My second baby is 6 months now, so I figure I’ve got another year and a half to lose it on your plan. I like that. Thanks. Oh, and you’re not that speshul. Breastfeeding makes my body think I’m still pregnant or something. While other nursing moms are melting into stick people, I keep getting fatter. Ugh! Good luck to you – I hope you find a size you are happy with!

  • SCY says:

    Way to Go Becks!

    Tips: (not sure if these hold any weight for those who are breastfeeding but here goes anyway)

    Try not eat any carbs after 17h00 at night – only have carbs during the day so that your body has time to use them.
    Loads of water – it sucks to chug it down but it works
    Exercise – i know you’re running around after 3 kids but try and take walks around your neighbourhood as well

    Wishing you all the best!

    xxx

  • quietgirl says:

    I have no tips- Just enjoyed reading this. I have a file on my computer at work named ‘drop_it_like_its_hot’, just cause I have to entertain myself. It, too, is not hot.
    :D

  • charmedgirl says:

    now that i’m off the who-fucking-cares-i’m-trying-to-get-pregnant-anyway diet, i’ve faced the reality that i need to lose the 30-40 lbs i NEVER lost after the first pregnancy.

    as an aside, you wanna laugh? you wanna hear the most underhanded compliment of all time?
    “you look good for triplets!”
    ummm, WTF? they’re not STILL IN THERE! and come on, they’re 4 years old for the love of god.

    i keep having to remind myself (since there’s no other reminder) that i DID also sustain a whole nother pregnancy a short year and a half ago…still not an excuse. a year and a half, without any sleeplessness or breastfeeding…still fat.

    two ivfs…gained another 11 lbs in three months!

    yeah so, i’m sick of being fat. 6 hefty bags and an entire rod of clothes in size 6 are in my closet. it’s been so long i think i might laugh when i pull out the out-of-fashion pieces.

    i’m on medifast now. i’m desperate.

    good girl for giong back to WW. that shit is hard but steady and makes you feel good. you’ll drop those LBs WAYYY faster than two years.

  • mumma boo says:

    Weight Watchers, Water and Wii Fit, baby. Now I have to listen to my own assvice. :) Good luck! (And even if you don’t think so, we think you’re hot. You’re on fire, baby! How can you not be with those sexy foot tatts?) Smooches!

  • The Mommy says:

    I usually gain a shitload of weight during each pregnancy as well (although this time is different, presumably because I’ve been sick with a cold or the flu since, oh, I dunno, SEPTEMBER). I really like that your goal is long-term. I’ve never used WW, but I know that you don’t really eliminate foods from your diet. Portion control is absolutely key.

    Another very important factor in weight loss has always gotta be exercise. I know, I know. I hate it, too. But the results are worth it. I would recommend starting slowly with some cardio (which will also help build muscle tone) and then you really have to strength train as well. The benefit of strength training is that muscle burns more calories than fat – so you can weigh the same and still get to eat more (always a good goal). My motto when trying to regain my girlish figure is to “do what you can, when you can.” People who think they need to work out for an hour at the gym to get any benefit are nuts. Mommies do not have that luxury. Instead, do 15 push-ups before you pick the baby up off of the floor. Or find something else that works for you. The point is to always do something.

    I did a post not too long ago about what I have found works for me. If I was tech savvy, I would somehow put a link here. But, alas, computers are not my friends…Good luck and keep us posted!

  • Ames says:

    Good luck! I’m in the same boat as you…except I was only down 30lbs from the 60 I gained with my first one when I got pregnant again, gained about 40lbs and now I’m still stuck at about 20lbs from where I started before I got pregnant this last time. I too am thinking of joining WW again…it worked wonders last time!

  • amy says:

    Good luck to you, hotness!!! The trick is to not get discouraged and give up too quickly. You have a realistic goal of 2 years, instead of two months, so you’re already ahead of most!

    Cardio is key. Although with three kids and the Davers work schedule, this could be tricky. But make yourself go for a run even if you’d rather have your toe nails pulled out one by one. Program some new kick ass music on your Ipod and just go.

    That’s what I did and the weight went really quick. Pulling for you honey, you can do it!!!

  • Kristine says:

    I honestly didn’t lose much baby weight until I weaned completely. While breastfeeding I was so completely ravenous that I was uncontrolable.

    But I have found that a watered down version of Atkins/South Beach works for me the best – also I have blood sugar issues to begin with, so that works for me anyway in other ways. Oh, and a cheat day – I can stick with any diet if I know that on Sunday I can have whatever I want.

  • Susan says:

    Oh, I wish you the best of luck. I don’t have baby weight to lose but the adultery weight doesn’t seem to come off any faster. I’m with you but I think you’re going to “outlose” me. Keep us posted!

  • Mrs Soup says:

    Good luck! Although I haven’t had that problem (my baby is 10 weeks old today and I lost 15 pounds in the first two trimesters then only gained 30 overall and am back to my pre-pregnancy weight) I am much more flubbery than I was before. Course, I wasn’t exactly at my ideal weight before I got pregnant either. So I’m still wanting to lose about 10-15 pounds in the next year but more importantly, get toned up again. I have the dreaded muffin top in my pants and while its the best part of the muffin to eat, I don’t like seeing it in the mirror.

    The Wii Fit is incredible. Such an amazing invention….the yoga will kick your ass. Seriously. Worth every penny!

  • kbrients says:

    Good for you for setting a goal… Now the part that I have had a hard time with… sticking with it!

  • rebekah says:

    Pre-pregnancy weight: 135. Post-partum weight: 180….TWO YEARS OUT. So, yeah, I’m with you. What diet which still keeps my relationship with occasional margaritas are we going on??? :D

  • Miss Grace says:

    I gained 65lbs when I was pregnant. 3 years later, I still have 10-15 to go, but I’m starting to lose hope. I’m also not doing shit about it, so I guess I could maybe diet or work out or something and hope a little harder?

  • Madame Yu See says:

    Ugh…I’m a few pounds lighter than my highest pregnancy weight, and the baby is 30 years old. I keep losing then regaining the same 15 -20 pounds over and over.
    I’m looking for advice from you – breast feed a baby, that could work – can I pick up a baby at Target? – I don’t come here to give you advice, well, I guess I do, but not about weight loss, and maintaing weight loss, which I suck at.

  • Meghan says:

    I give up trying to lose the weight. I’m all for the stress will make me lose it. If I starve myself I will lose it all overnight:o Hasn’t happened yet but I’m holding out for it. I love to aquasize withall the old ladies:o And I have been asking for rollerblades that actually fit for about 4 years now. We live by a river valley so tonnes of trails to kill myself on, nothing like road rash to make you work for it!!

  • PiquantMolly says:

    Whatever happens, don’t beat yourself up. You just grew and ejected a HUMAN BEING from your VAGINA for christ’s sake. Don’t deny yourself, and don’t overexercise. Be good to your body and your body will settle on a weight that is the right one for your body to be.

  • Betty M says:

    I found that there were always excess pounds that were impossible to shed until b/feeding stopped. I thebn tended to go bck into either treatment, more pregnancies and then eating up endless leftover toddler meals so am still 15lbs out.

  • If 19+ months of bf-ing have taught me anything about NOT losing weight then let me tell you now in one word: amputation.

  • heather says:

    Don’t worry too much til the baby is weaned. Just eat right. However, I personally hated WW. It’s just another fancy way of counting calories, and I can do THAT for free. I’m currently on a low carb diet, and I have refused to weigh myself for the past 3 weeks. I pulled out pants I couldn’t even button at Christmas time (even lying on my back coated in crisco) and I can now get them buttoned (it isn’t pretty but it’s proof I’ve lost weight). Low carb isn’t for everyone, I admit that. The beauty of it has been that my appetite is FINALLY naturally supressed, after 10 years of trying every diet ever invented.

  • Betts says:

    No tips from me. My baby is 6 years old and my ass will never look the same as it did pre-pregnancy. You’d think I carried her in my ass. I’m going to start doing a Latin dance tape to lose weight and get toned up back there. I’d rather sit on the couch and watch “Dancing With The Stars”.

  • jen says:

    2 years is a great goal.
    I gained 60lbs with my first and 50lbs with my second.
    I lost the whole 60lbs of my first child in two years. I really did and it was fine. nice and slow and real. nothing crazy.
    i’m about 5lbs away from finishing losing the 50lb i gained with my second. alhtough I should really lose a total of 10 more.
    short term goals and crash diets dont work for me. (or most in my opinion)
    YOU CAN DO IT. have a little faith. don’t be hard on yourself.
    when you feel bad – just look at the babies.
    one tip…..I make a pot of homemade soup (chicken and vegetables) every sunday. its really easy. I eat that for lunch every day. I really think that it has helped the weight loss. I never have to question what my lunch is. I always know i’m eating vegetables. its healthy. and its filling. slightly boring but, welll I really think it worked.
    good luck.

  • jerseygirl89 says:

    I gain a lot when preggo too and breastfeeding just makes me hungry so svelte I’m not. But I’m trying.

    My current attempts include not eating donuts anymore and exercising.

    I should totally write a diet book, huh?

  • Badass Geek says:

    So looking like Mr Gacy is a bad thing?

    I was kinda hoping that I could go on tour doing impersonations of him, minus the whole rape/murder/using my victims as foundation for my home thing.

  • Interested says:

    You might feel better about yourself if you posted some bikini pics people could look at and give you positive feedback on…

  • Female Engineering Professor says:

    I used WW to lose weight after Baby #2. Lately the scale creeped back up into my-favorite-pants-too-tight range. I discovered the Daily Plate at livestrong.com It works just like WW’s online tool for tracking what you eat and what you weigh. But it’s free. And I think it’s better – it has more commercial products in it’s system. There’s an iPhone/iPod touch app as well. Even my husband’s into it.

  • Nity says:

    I was a big fan of the slimfast thing – I did that recently and lost 15 lb. You can do it just with the drinks alone, but it does help if you can exercise some. I walked 3 mi a night and it was such a huge stress relief for me. With all your kiddos, not sure if you can take that much time. I liked it because I just focused on drinking the shakes for breakfast and lunch (and ate a small supplement). Occasionally I’d snack, but as my tummy got smaller I needed less snacks. And the snacks would be healthy – like pretzels. Then I’d eat whatever the family (aka me cooking for hubby) had for dinner.

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