Who IS Aunt Becky?
Becky Sherrick Harks, or Your Aunt Becky, as the Internet knows her, is the creator of her very own weblog, Mommy Wants Vodka. You should know this by now if you’re reading these words on your own computer screen. In 2005, she launched the sarcastic blog, Mommy Wants Vodka. She’s also the founder of the (almost) non-profit weblog Band Back Together, which is a safe place created for those who have written out their demons, paired with resource pages ranging from the topics of love to adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse.
In the time she’s been a “blogger,” she’s gone from exactly zero followers (save for some spam bots that she likes to call “Harry”) to becoming a household name. She’s been nominated numerous times for the most esteemed blogging award, The Bloggies, and won exactly zero times.
Becky Sherrick Harks is, shockingly enough, a bachelor’s prepared nurse, who has retired from the hospital life to spend her days surfing the Internet and annoying friends and family with stupid Facebook status updates.
She’s also a freelancing writer of humor and satire, although, upon occasion, can be a heartfelt philanthropist (just don’t tell anyone that – she’d hate to lose her cool edge).
Sherrick Harks lives in a suburb of Chicago with her three kids, imagining her life married to men from television and hoping that one day, ONE day, she’ll see an actual pony on roller skates.
What Does She Look Like?
Yup. Maybe a little less blurry, though.
Woah, I So Totally Need To Advertise With You:
Aww, that’s so sweet! You’re right: you do.
For advertising, I have some ad dudes, Nate and Dave, who handle my advertising. Here are a couple of options, all proposals can be sent to this email: firstname.lastname@example.org . If you don’t see anything you like, go ahead and email that email address and we’ll see what we can do.
What About Writing? Do You Have A Portfolio?
Shockingly, yes, Sherrick Harks has a full profile of her work here, at Becky Sherrick Harks. She can write anything from satire, to parenting stuffs, to medical-type information. She writes so often that these sites ACTUALLY pay her to do so:
Sherrick Harks is available to write for you, too, should you be so inclined.
Does She Sell Crap?
You should buy some.
Aunt Becky Is A Philanthropist? I Don’t Believe It.
Yup, the rumors are indeed true: Becky Sherrick Harks is a philanthropist. She created, launched and web-masters (totally a word) her soon-to-be-non-profit site, Band Back Together. Band Back Together is a group blog for anyone to share their stories of abuse, trauma, mental illness, infertility, baby loss and other dark things.
Here’s a bit more about The Band:
Who are we? We’re The Band.
We’re a band of survivors. We’re here to put a face to everything once kept in the dark. We’re here to show the world that you can go through hell and come out the other side.
So, pull up that old tattered leather chair and make yourself a drink. Pull your skeletons from their closet and make them dance the tango. Alone, we are small. Together, we are mighty.
We are all connected.
We are none of us alone.
Share your story.
It’s time to get the Band Back Together.
What’s Your Email? I Want To Send You A Pony on Roller Skates:
email@example.com is my email. I’m not sure you can email a pony, tho. Maybe you could fax one?
Okay, So You Say You Have A Book?
Sherrick Harks is in the middle of three books, ranging from humorous memoirs to life with a medically fragile child. While she once had agents, they parted ways, so Sherrick Harks is always looking for a new agent, as she’s already got a fantastic platform for promotion.
Are you an agent? Go ahead and email Becky: firstname.lastname@example.org
You should totally publish her book.
What Are Your Current Stats?
These are Mommy Wants Vodka’s current stats from Google Analytics:
What Do Those Stats Mean?
I don’t know, but I think it’s pretty.
Social Media’s A Big Deal Right Now. What’s Your Number(s), Baby?
Twitter @mommywantsvodka: 20K followers, including several celebrities such as Judy Blume and Felicity Huffman, and, her most prized follower: Little Debbie.
Her current Twitter Klout score is 61. She’s not sure if that’s good or bad.
Personal Facebook Profile: 2,500 friends. This makes Sherrick Harks feel popular, even though most of those are spam bots.
Facebook Page: 2,300 likes. It doesn’t show the amount of DIS-likes, but she guesses they’re probably far greater.
Tumblr Profile: A whopping 250 followers on Tumblr.
Pinterest Profile: 1,000 followers subscribe to see all of the crappy pictures she posts.
LinkedIn: Unsure of why she even HAS this set up, Sherrick Harks has 330 connections.
Google Plus Profile – presuming it’s the “better Facebook,” Sherrick Harks set it up and has over 2K followers.
What About Contests – Will You Do A Contest For My Product?
If the price is right, yes. If you think we can strike a deal, in which you pay me for my time, for sure. I mean, you’re taking away precious seconds I could spend watching youtube videos of cats playing the piano.
If you think you can make me an offer I can’t refuse, email me: email@example.com
What About Product Reviews? Are You A PR Friendly Blogger?
What does that even mean, “PR Friendly Blogger?”
If the price is right, yes. I’m really not into spending my time testing out shampoo or whatever because my audience, my awesome Pranksters, they’re not going to care much about it. Frankly, neither would I.
But…if you think you’ve got something I might like to review, email me: firstname.lastname@example.org
Can You Put Up My SEO-Keyword-Heavy-Article About Stuff TOTALLY Unrelated To Your Blog So I Can Have A Link Back To My Blog?
I’m a writer. I write words. I have an audience that likes words too. So there’s no way I’m going to abuse my audience by putting up something for them about 27 uses for hair gel. Unless they involved rats. Because a rat with a mowhawk is hilarious.
Can I Send You A Yacht?
I thought you’d never ask. OF COURSE you can!